Jail can be incredibly expensive!
Exactly! Make sure it’s a felony otherwise you might be billed for every day you’re in jail. Plus, a good enough felony will get you to prison for a good long time. Basically, anything with “grand” in the front of it.
Some joker robbed a US post office in my town a year or so ago. Federal felony.
Is that the guy who demanded $1 from the teller and then just sat down to wait for the cops?
You can end up paying room and board, mandatory counseling, classes, drug tests, etc. Plus phone calls are outrageously expensive. It’s a total racket.
How does that work if you don’t have money or just don’t? I mean what are they going do? Put you in jail?
Take a piece of all future income until it’s paid off of you pass away. At least here you can personally bankrupt once in a life time and live on “lowest livable” amount of money for five years and then get the debts “forgiven” except those accrued during the five year period.
It’s a hassle to apply and get granted though, usually not the privacy invasion invasion a recently released care to subject to
Would it be possible to volunteer some time to an organization like food not bombs I heard they were getting fines and arrested for distributing food. You could possibly secure some food, help the community and still potentially go to prison for not paying the bogus fine.
Shoplift food until you get caught and go to jail.
If you get caught without going to jail just keep shoplifting, at least you’ll always have food.
Just make sure to do it from Walmart or Lowblaw or some other government teet sucking price gouging corporation.
I’ve heard of some people robbing a bank. The banks will generally give you the money if you threaten them and the camera will usually make it easy to identity you as a robber. You don’t even need a gun, you just have to threaten people.
There was someone years ago that used a bank/prison to get their cancer treated. I was thinking along these lines. Wear clothing that can not conceal anything, pass the teller a note, place a squirt gun on the counter, pass it to them, and then lie on the ground until police arrive.
I generally disagree with the entire plan, but if you’re going to do anything like this, there is a large difference between getting caught with a weapon and not. Maybe even a squirt gun. You do not need to have a weapon to get convicted of robbing a bank.
Any suggestion of a weapon makes the robbery charge “aggrevated”
Former bank employee here. You don’t need a squirt gun. Theoretically you can walk into a bank, tell the teller you’re robbing them and demand $1, then sit patiently on a bench and await police. The problem is that the judge at your sentencing will see that you are not truly a danger and give you probation. You will also have to pay fines.
Bear in mind that prison is not free. You are charged every day you are there, and will receive the minimum care to keep you alive.
The best option is to get a bus ticket to a part of the US with fewer homeless folks and good safety nets, then get a social worker. They will require that you don’t have any living family who can help, so bear that in mind.
+1. There are homeless shelters all over the US in every state, with varying services and capacity. Los Angeles is one of the worst cities for homeless services due to the weather keeping so many people there, it’s a much easier place for people to live outside year-round than Michigan or Texas, for example.
You probably want to go to a minimum security federal prison. The easiest way to get there that I think of is check fraud.
You’ll need to write a bunch or bad checks in as many states as you can, or send them through the mail. You’ll need to do this a lot, and for a pretty significant amount of money otherwise they’ll just give you probation of some sort.
Having a disability might be a problem though; if it costs too much medically to keep you in prison they’ll just out you back on the street as a compassionate release.
Ideally you want to go to a shelter first, because if a shelter is dangerous or unclean you can just leave (unlike jail). If you can’t find a shelter that has space for you, the next best thing is to sleep somewhere visible but somewhat sheltered and out of the way. Church doorways are ideal since if they find you they will usually offer you help rather than call the cops on you.
If none of those avenues are available to you, hit up your local library. If they don’t outright have a social worker on staff they’ll know how to put you in contact with one and help you with applying for benefits that can at least keep you fed, and will hopefully know how to most effectively get you in line for housing.
I’m too physically limited for range of mobility like this. I can’t seem to find anyone that can diagnose what is actually wrong with my spine. It is in a rare region and complex. Nothing major comes up in a radiologist’s MRI report, and neurosurgeons all come with a severe legislatively induced allergy to anything complicated to diagnose or work on. Of 13, only one spent the time to get into the weeds and it was only to make up a legally plausible narrative reason to claim I needed several fusions. They only took the time because they were about to lose their license for malpractice (something I had no clue about at the time). There is no such thing as a House like spinal doctor that will observationally diagnose a person regardless of their ability to treat or the risk involved. If they diagnose the issue they will face subpoenas and lots of time wasted to bureaucratic nonsense. The only options appear to be paying several thousand dollars for a shady lawyer that can bribe their way through the hoops of capitalist privateers or homelessness/suicide. This is Los Angeles where there are 100k homeless within 100 miles of where I lay. There are no available social workers, and every shelter is beyond full. Even the homeless that try to group to help each other are attacked like rabid feral animals by orders of the criminal Newsom. I need a more effective plan.
I’m sorry you’re going through all that, I’m living in LA and also disabled from spinal issues so I’ve experienced a lot of what you’re talking about as well. I’ve basically resigned myself to ‘smoke weed all the time’ being the extent of medical management of my pain, because doctors can’t/won’t do anything else for me without potentially making other problems worse. Back problems are awful and not having any concrete answers is just about as bad.
What part of LA are you in, roughly, if you’re OK sharing? If you’re able to ride public transit I’d be happy to search around to try to find more resources near you.
In addition to getting arrested being dangerous, sleeping on a jail cot is probably going to be absolutely godawful for your back, at least as bad as sleeping in a doorway. If you’re sleeping on the ground outside you at least have some control over your environment, compared to jail.
Thanks. I’m in south OC and not in any present danger or state of mind. I was just denied disability for the second time in 4 years and trying to talk myself into mental options available beyond lead or fentanyl as my ultimate outcome.
Holding posture for longer than an hour has cascading repercussions that last days to weeks. If I am upright, ie. sitting or standing, I am hurting. After around an hour of endurance, I will be unable to sleep well enough to recover. I barely ever sleep six hours a day at most and even that is rather low quality. I turn into a zombie if this lasts for more than a week or so. At that point I start showing signs of severe sleep deprivation and mental instability typical of any human in such a state. My entire life revolves around avoiding this state. I have plenty of money and security for now, but no way to effectively support myself long term. I’m well above average and mentally capable, but I go through periodic ups and downs that are unpredictable. Stupid minor things can injure me. The lows disconnect me from a professionally competent state of mind, and I’m generally irritable enough to not be very pleasant to be around in person. I want to be, and be myself, but the best way to put it is that my pain is constant and like living with a neighbour that always plays annoyingly loud music; EVERYTHING I do is forced to shout over that noise. It is like my internal voice is shouting over that noise and I must listen carefully to hear it. Sometimes it is just too noisy and hard to focus past it. When I am upright holding posture in any way, the noise is slowly getting louder. In physical terms, it feels like I give you a 1lb dumbbell and tell you to hold it at shoulder height with your arm fully extended–easy… at first…but try doing it for an hour. I’ve stubbornly pushed WAY past it to prove to myself it is not a mental thing. I was on the floor of a restaurant writhing in sharp shooting pain when a long time friend came to visit. I didn’t sleep for days and took almost 2 months to recover to the point of sleeping 6 hours for the first time.
I have nerve issues. My nerves just move around, usually due to an injury, but not always. Never had a doctor diagnose me properly. They wanted to fix my knee cap surgically or tell me that my pelvis moves. If I bend, or sleep, or lift the wrong way something moves. I can’t keep a bent position very long, and sometimes my knee just randomly hurts after walking. Sometimes I get shooting pains in my elbows.
I know this sounds ridiculous, but, finally I got word of a guy from mexico, he was really old and most likely dead by now, but he was known as a massage healer. He would zero in on the spot and just work his magic. After going back a few times, it would stay mostly stay in place. I did have to exercise a bit (walking was enough) so the muscles would keep the nerve in place, but I could do so pain free.
Either way, I got too lazy and of course the pain came back. I’ve been to a couple other people who claim to do what he did, but its never worked the same. Closest anyone ever got to keeping me pain free for any amount of time, was a sports masseuse.
I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of someone in your area like that, but it might be worth a shot. He would tell stories of how he helped all sorts of people with all sorts of aliments. This guy was well known in the Hispanic community, and people would come from other states just to see him, for all sorts of issues. If someone like this exists around you, they should be too hard to find if you ask the right people. Worst that can happen is you get a massage.
My symptoms are similar to yours, if not quite so bad. I can’t walk more than about 50 yards, or stand for more than 10-15 minutes. I have tried for disability after my physical issues made me quit my job (after a couple of decades being a teacher for the same school district). I moved back in with my parents. Sucks to be in my 50s and stuck like this, but at least I have a roof over my head. I’m in north OC. There is zero help until you run out of all options and all money. It’s really fucked up. Good luck.
I’m sorry dude, I’ve had a lot of family members go through the wringer trying to get disability as well. The one and only person I’ve ever known to get it first try was dying of cancer. The system is made to make people give up when they’re least able to fight it, it’s sickening.
I’m not familiar with any of OC so I’m not going to be any more helpful than a Google search on that front. But oh man, do I hear you on what the lack of sleep from pain does to you. I feel lucky I’m able to get 6-7 hours most nights, minus time spent waking up and trying to get comfortable. Thank fuck Ikea makes comparatively inexpensive foam mattresses. If you aren’t on gabapentin already, it helps with nerve pain and makes a decent sleep aid.
Are you familiar with the idea of pacing? It’s a strategy recommended for patients with ME/CFS to prevent triggering relapses, and I’ve found those ideas to be a useful way to manage chronic pain as well, on the preventative end.
Good luck man, I’ve been dealing with this shit for over half my life at this point. It sucks and it’s hard and it’s not fair and we might actually be living in one of the worst countries to be dealing with chronic medical issues. If you feel like wanting to scream and beat someone bloody over it, well, to me that’s pretty understandable.
totally doesnt answer the original question
That’s a question without an answer, because there is no safe way to get the LAPD to arrest you.
Kk
I’m white, so I won’t be murdered on sight as long as I arrive clean and clean cut. I move slowly and it is not difficult for any half intelligent person to see I’m in bad physical shape. Placing my hands behind my back may harm me considerably, but not as much as making me hold posture to sit in a car and get processed. I’d take the strongest pain meds I have in advance.
I’m white, so I won’t be murdered on sight
I don’t think this came out the way you envisioned it
Of course there is, be White and Rich.
A shelter is normally dorm style sleeping arrangements with lunatics and meth heads sans food or anywhere to be during the day. Not all places will even offer food or medical even
Sounds like all jails barring a shitty yard to walk in for a bit each day. The food is also often spoiled or otherwise fucked up somehow. OP mentioned having a highly specific and hard to pin down spinal disability. Jails and prisons are much more likely to make that far worse.
Basically every problem people can think of will often apply to jail or prison and OP wont be able to leave when they want. Plus, when they get out, they’ll have new debts to pay, and a shiny new record to carry around for the rest of their lives.
Honestly though, I think OP is just baiting.
Not baiting. Just trying to convince myself that lead or fentanyl is not my only option within the decade and after my folks die. If those are my only options, it is hard to justify remaining a burden to them in the interm, and holding off the inevitable. This is the depressing reality. All those homeless people out there; the majority are in my shoes but just further down the timeline. This country has a policy of coerced suicide as a social safety net.
I was disabled by a terrible driver while riding a bicycle to work 2/26/14. I was the Buyer for a chain of bike shops, riding on a designated bike route, an amateur racer, on a $4500 demo bike, in a nice area, close to the beach. I’m you, on a bad day with some shit luck. This is your reality too. You are one bad day away from where I lay right now. You’re not smarter or better. You can not account for a driver that pulls directly into another SUV suddenly and sends the second car into you. No skill or intuition or caution can save you from such a circumstance. It doesn’t matter if you’re on a bicycle, in a car, walking, or even laying on a couch in your living room. This kind of event can still find you. When it does, in the USA, you will be pushed into homelessness, destitution, and an anonymous death on a cold rainy night in a gutter. This is the American standard of ethics and morality; yours and mine; our standard of ethics and morality.
“Bad things happen when good people do nothing.” -MLK
I did nothing in practice. So I am part of the problem. All I can do is tell you of the reality. I am you, after a single bad day at the hands of someone else. I don’t even remember the crash or anything due to my head injury. I woke up from a blank darkness suddenly with the last thing I remembered was riding and being in motion on a beautiful February morning.
The real answer that anyone can realistically give you is to fight for your life and dont give in to despair. You can have your time to despair of course, but dont let it swallow you. Thats pretty general and beyond that, it’ll be advice to seek out programs that help which is also general and not always helpful.
Your life is your own and flavored with so many variables that internet people can only help so much. I won’t give you advice, but I will tell you who I am and maybe that will help in some small way.
I am a double leg amputee. A hip disarticulation on the left (no leg at all) and an above knee amputation on the right. I was a 35 year old professional driver with a six month old daughter when the accident that took my legs happened to me. I had no fault in it and had no way of seeing it coming. It was something I was forced to deal with. I was in a coma for a month.
I woke up to endless pain, an ended relationship that was rocky anyway and a body so weak I had to start from scratch on even basic things like opening a can of soda. I was told I would have to use a power chair because of how damaged I was. I worked to be stronger than that and I succeeded, despite my endless phantom limb pain sometimes driving me insane. I use a manual chair by choice and I can do many other things I was told I wouldn’t be able to do again. Being legless and poor didn’t even stop me from meeting my wife, who is doing crafts with my daughter next to me.
It’s been a decade since the accident and my life is more solidly grounded now then it ever was when I was able bodied. I faced enormous pain and physical challenges and still do, but I’m glad of it. It was the forging fire that revealed who I am now.
There is a you that is looking back from a decade in the future. Who do they see in you now? The beginning of some maudlin end without even a fight, or the spark that eventually became your fire? If I can get through the shit, so can you.
Sorry about your situation. You bring up a good point. Our economy and gov is so shit about housing, that it actually does make sense to commit a crime to have a place to stay. I’m guessing, it would be better to commit some kind of non-violent white collar crime? I don’t know. I’m not a lawyer. This just sucks. Sorry. 😔
I think you’d definitely want a federal minimum security camp. Think more along the lines of mail fraud or some other white collar crime.
Walk into a police station and state you just killed someone. They will lock you up, just be coy about who and where the body is and they will keep you locked up, maybe. If you want out just recant and say you just wanted some shelter. Without a body or a crime scene you will be free to go. IANAL or a cop so I could be 100% wrong in my scheme.
I feel icky responding to this because it highlights how shitty society is at taking care of our less fortunate, but if I was inclined to get myself into jail I would probably start with shoplifting the things I need to survive like food, camping supplies, etc. Very low risk of violence and if I don’t get caught, hey I’m better off.
Eventually I’d get caught. Then I can just keep not showing up for court and shoplifting food. Eventually I’ll get thrown in jail and when released I start all over. After enough times I’d graduate from county jail to prison.
I’m not recommending this course of action, but it’s probably what I’d do if that was my goal. Nobody gets hurt.
for less drama, you could “steal” property from someone you know and they could helpfully press charges so you can get arrested.
just a heads up, most prisons in the US are pay to stay, so you’ll accrue debt while inside, and depending on what state you’re in you might have to put up a copay for your medical care.
I’d advise doing a little research and committing your inoffensive bank robbery or the like in the right area.
I saw a video where a guy “robbed” a bank of $1, with a “gun” that was actually a snickers bar. Then sat in the lobby and waited for the cops.
That seems like a good way to rob a bank, which is a federal crime, while not hurting anyone. And the tellers would even be able to figure out whats going on.
That sounds like a good way to get shot…
By a bank teller?
By a cop.
Cop comes in, sees you sitting in a bank lobby chair, knees crossed, and you think the first thing he’d do is just start blasting???
Look, I think cops are despicable too. Theres even a comment in my recent comments about the Uvalde cops where I rip them a new asshole.
But this is kind of a stretch.
Trayvon Martin would like a word with you
Guy who shot Trayvon Martin wasn’t a cop.
Have you been to America? This is reality.
Childish Gambino is a national treasure. He could be such a bigger star if he wanted to be.
If you’re not white, yes, better say your prayers before the cops arrive, even if you’re just chilling there.
I saw a paper once that your risk of getting shot is inversely proportional to the severity of the situation up to a point.
Adjusted for frequency you are more likely to get shot during a traffic stop than a armed suspect call because they arrive expecting an armed suspect and act accordingly, every traffic stop could turn into a shootout even if it isnt likely to so they tend to overreact.
Be white.
I’m not sure how LAPD handles it, but I know that in a lot of cities, the police may just let you go if they think you’re using jail as free shelter.
A buddy of mine spent a couple years homeless here in Austin, and would do low-level crimes like vandalizing things just to get picked up by the cops. He said that the police stopped arresting him after a while, and figured it was because he wasn’t escalating his crimes at all; he didn’t want to hurt anyone, he just wanted to sleep indoors for the night.
I’m sure LAPD is similarly too overworked and their jails too overcrowded to keep you there for more than a night or two, honestly.
Piss on the front door of the jail? idk
I understand, and I will hurt myself long before I would consider hurting anyone else. Fortunately, or un- depending on perspective, I am extremely capable of creative thinking in the abstract intuitive sense, and nearly what one might call competent at the applied sciences. I can think of many ways to be dangerous. White collar would be most effective in that sense. I could be an advanced script kiddie if I tried. It is not hard to devise a plan that would induce a strong response to make an example out of.
This post is primarily therapeutic; to feel like I can call some degree of attention to the frustrating reality. And to feel a little less hopeless and abandoned in the evenings following another denial of disability after waiting 2 years, and for the second time. My folks are showing their age, and existentialism is creeping in occasionally.
Have you tried getting an entry level remote IT job? There are also sites that essentially hire for small programming projects, etc. Might not be steady but might be enough if managed well.
Digital vigilante? Target health insurance / medical billing companies plz.
Sneakier, just add legitimate disability documentation into the relevant system and bump yourself to the front of the interview/validation process.
It’s a crime sure but not a particularly harmful one and if you never get caught you still get what you actually want without having to feel to terrible about breaking a law since it’s government ineptitude that got you into the situation in the first place and civil disobedience is legal and an exceptionally drawn out process for cities and states to fight.
Damn it’s sad that this post even exists. I hope things get better for you chief.
