Sorry, gonna have to miss the rapture, I have DnD this weekend.
Hi guys, its the 19th here in Australia already and I can confirm that I have been Left Behind to suffer heck on earth for being a sinner and Im super over it already.
Everyone is dead. Everyone except us.
Party time!
Nah mate, that’s just fuckin Thursdy.
Aw fuckin’ hell!
ahhh cheer up mate, its friday tomorow, fuckin pissup day!
Mate, Im doing cashies for a bloke all long weekend, 6am starts, Im bloody spewing. Reckon he’ll sling me a block of piss though, so she’ll be right.
You sure everybody got raptured and you’re not just in Australia?
I would get letters from my grandma - long, winding beseeching me to come to the Lord or whatever, with often a specific date predicted in the near future of the end times. I never kept them because I was embarrassed. She was lonely and mentally ill, and probably trying to manipulate people into visiting her, but she also believed the shit she was saying, even though it kept changing, IMO.
I think that’s a little bit of what is going on with these signs
The rapture probably did happen but nobody on earth was worthy.
It’s gonna be 10:12pm so we have time for a last meal still if you want before Jesus chucks everyone in the woodchipper. 😊
There were 666 likes to this post. I ruined it by turning it to 667!
Do we need any more proof that the rapture is over and we missed it?
Jesus came, broke my fridge, and didn’t even leave a note. Asshole.
Still the 18th here. Anyone know where I can buy some inflatable sex dolls and helium at this hour?
Why helium?
So they float, of course.
This is an old internet joke.
To inflate the sex dolls… He prefers doing chicks when they’re high.
Maybe so the sex doll will go to heaven too
Oh I get it. He knows because he’s a depraved perv he isn’t getting raptured so he’s gonna fill it with helium, hold on as it rises, then enter heaven with a sex doll and fuck it silly in front of St Peter while cumming with a high pitched moan.
Good plan, actually.
Fuck no it ain’t gonna happen, I gotta finish my studying so I can actually work fuck that
I’m pretty sure my plans are fine. Jesus is going to take one look at us and turn around.
Post-Rapture looting anyone?
Why do you think I still live in Texas?
If you already live in hell, nothing changes?
I don’t know how to post gifs 😭
They dont make it easy
You have to post an external link to them, you can’t upload them.
Everyone gets a new phone!
Woohoo!
Why not Pre-Rapture looting?
I MISSED IT!?
No, they neglected to put the first part of the year, it’s happening in 2124.
Whew ok… Just 100 more years and I can learn to rap
Not again
Afraid so. Hope you enjoy the great snatch.
sigh - Days without thinking about her: 0
the lady in the red dress?
(snatch is a euphemism for vagina)
The rapture is when we all get vacuumed back up into Eve’s vagina, so it works.
Probably better than going back into Adam’s balls.
Phenomenal snatch.
What happens if you have a Sinful Thought during “The Great Snatch”? Do you get un-Snatched? What if you immediately Repent? Do you get Snatched again? Will there be people bouncing back and forth indefinitely?
From snatch you came, and to snatch you shall return.
Welp, I have only now seen this post on the 19.09.2024.
I guess I did not only miss the notification, but also the rapture itself.
“Yes! I have the foresight to predict The RaptureTM, but not the foresight to fit the words onto a cardboard sign…” lol
