Twitter. Twitter twitter twitter.
Calling it by its dead name I see.
If Elon doesn’t respect her daughter’s indentity then I won’t respect its company.
I try to avoid using Elon as a role model.
Xitter. Xitter xitter xitter.
(pronounced shitter)
I also like referring to it as Shitler
Also
‘He took to Twitter and tweeted a tweet.’
Should now be
‘He took to Xitter and xat a xit.’
The X being pronounced ‘sh’ every time.
twitter is dead and a shit zombie stands where it was
First time I saw a print of the headline I thought it was fake lmao.
It’s like an old kind of onion headline, before someone fucked with the timeline and realities got mixed up.
Nice profile picture!
Top Men.
Sending their best.
Why do they keep using younger pictures of him for these articles? Why don’t they show him the way he is right now?
if your readers realize they keep dry heaving whenever they click one of your articles you will soon have no more readers. that troglodyte looks like a lovecraftian sea monster. no one wants to see that.
That should be the header image for c/blunderyears
This was the first warning. We all saw him cosplay as a Matrix extra, and we did laugh at him, but we didn’t bully this dork ass bitch enough.
I don’t think bullying dorks who cosplay as their cyberpunk OC will help. Bully billionaires instead.
I think he could have got two birds stoned at once with this one.
But if we bully dorks that means people will bully me as well :(
You’re safe with us friend. We (I only actually speak for myself) only bully those that deserve it. The ones that bully the little people now that they have made it. Personally, I’m not bullying him for the look and picture. I’m bullying him for being a racist, conceited, fucking ass hole who lost his way over some mother fucking monayyyyy
Everytime I think I’m a little “out there”, I remember THIS dork exists, which frees up my mind to do other things.
Like put on a mushroomhead XX logo painted jason mask, a diana ross wig, and flannel shirt so I could go to a Fiona Apple concert, mostly against my will, get up to the front of the stage and start waving my hand enthusiastically and yell “HI HIPPIE LADY!!! HELLO!!! HELLO HIPPIE LADY!!! HIIIIIII!!!” as her bassist had to walk off stage from laughing too much, Fiona Apple looking annoyed, and 2000 people all glaring daggers at me. Luckily the crowd was 100% females besides me. So no violence towards my antics actually took place.
Times are crazy. Especially when I remember that story is like 20 years old.
Wait… You did this?
And if they’re going to use a younger picture of him at least use the one from before he got the hair transplant:
There’s those tiny regressive Republican 1950’s entitled white thumbs—
👍🏻”AYYYYYYYYYY!!!”👍🏻
Why you gotta do Fonzie like that?
Did Musk e-transfer it himself? How could Xitter possibly mess this up?
Well, when you fire all the competent people solely so that you can brag about the number of people you fired…
Trump’s government efficiency guy in action, folks!
Sounds like the guy I want to be running emergency management!
NGL, if I worked at Twitter, it was probably because I get paid extremely well and there’s no alternatives. So I’d absolutely phone it in. On a good day, id half ass it. And on the average day, id be copying and pasting chatGPT code directly into production servers, just enough work to not get fired, but not too much where I’ll get pulled into a meeting as someone who can solve critical problems.
Gonna bet that’s how every twitter employee is.
Found the Canadian.
I’ve been found out!!
I was pretty surprised to learn that Interac e-transfer or equivalent isn’t commonplace everywhere.
If you want to punish Musk in a meaningful way, then once the fine has been paid in full, the countdown can start. Once the same amount of time that elapsed between Twitter’s first noncompliance and the fine’s check cleared, then Twitter should be allowed back online. There will always be money to pay fines but they’ll never get the time back. Other companies will take note.
Coming from Musk I still think he did it on purpose just to spite the judge.
I wonder if that insane musking urgency is in any way related to baking up local elections that will take place there some time soon
On behalf of Banko del Tesoro Nacional de Veracruz Y Pavon Familia Santiago Amen de Guadalupe de Saltillo, gracias, muchisisimas gracias senior Musko!
*muito obrigado
Look, I’m going to interpret this as Elon sending the money to a bank in sone other part of LatAm. Not only because Brazil’s official language is Portuguese, but also because it’s way funnier like this!
Si senior! En mejico todo es mejor! We can just dream a little 500million mistake for Mexicans everywhere. That makes things feel better.
I wonder if it would have been brilliant if it was “Elon Musk’s X Still Down in Brazil After Company Sends $5.2 Billion instead of $5.2 Million for the Fine to Charity Organization instead of Bank”
“Sir, this is First National Total Landscaping”
I wonder how much this will come back to hurt the company. Musk & co. want to play dumb games? Enjoy watching all the potential Xitter users in Brazil flock to Bluesky and other platforms while your site remains in the dark.
Xitter isn’t special. People will find ways to socialize online with or without it. And the longer people go without it, the more momentum other sites will gain. Whether this stalling is deliberate or unintented doesn’t matter, the fact is they’re only hurting their own bottom line when an entire country is disengaged from their platform.
In other words, keep it up, Elon. It’s fun to see some natural consequences arise from your stupid behavior.
Keep in mind this is “X, the everything app”. Musk expects it to be your one stop on the internet for everything, including online banking.
PayPal is already shitty enough at it is, we don’t need another crappy payment app.
“Why do one thing well when you can be bad at everything instead”
- Leon Skum
Anyone who wants the internet to be like this… It’s hard to describe adequately.
The idea makes me as angry as I was when I was a kid and first heard about the destruction of the library of Alexandria. It is a deep dark rage.
With proper open protocols for communication with various services such a ‘everything’ app could become a thing at some point.
Where I live we already have a single app (owned for a large part by the govt) we can use to log in to most official services, and any decent-size service can apply to offer log in using it. Going from that concept it really isn’t too much of a stretch to an “everything app” becoming a thing.
Your thing and Leon’s dream has one major difference. Thanks to those open protocols, multiple companies could build everything apps and compete on service, with all of them being able to access all you need.
Leon does not want Twitter to be an everything app, he wants it to be the everything app that you can’t escape, owns all your data, and you can’t get on with doing basic shit without paying him money.
He basically wants to monopolize everything, because he’s bad at competition, because he’s bad at it.
Brilliant.
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