• Baggins [he/him]@lemmy.ca
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    1 month ago

    This is what peak mansplaining looks like. She didn’t ask a question and I’m almost sure she already knows the why.

      • Baggins [he/him]@lemmy.ca
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        1 month ago

        So do yourself and FartMonster2k not know about PornHub, or…?

        An older adult following a bunch of much younger people on normal social media for sexual purposes is 100% weird.

        • redisdead@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          What’s the difference between a porn video and some chick posting their tits on twitter for all to see?

        • Vespair@lemm.ee
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          1 month ago

          How old do you think the women on pornhub are? What makes them more acceptable to look at over the women on instagram? I mean if we’re talking about dudes perving on private social media accounts of 15 year olds, yeah of course that’s fucked up. But that isn’t at all the implication I got here, rather I assumed he’s talking about OnlyFans models and other young women (not girls) who are offering their looks as a product, like Yellz0 or Kaitlyn Krems. In that case, this is extremely normal, and not really any different than the nearly 100 years of Hollywood; or did you assume the beautiful young starlets were only meant to appeal to their age peers (despite being cast and promoted by primarily older men)?

          Hollywood, magazines, art, sales catalogues, and pornography; they are all selling the sexual appeal of young adulthood. And so long as the men and women being gazed at are willingly and consensually offering the display of their body, and they’re of legal and intellectual ability to consent, then nobody is being wronged here, and nobody is behaving abnormally. These women deserve respect (as do the women on pornhub, to be clear; I’m still trying to understand what separates the two entities to you), and stepping over established boundaries, personal or social, is not okay obviously, but assuming the caveats I’ve outlined, I see nothing disrespectful about buying what somebody is willfully selling.

          As for the age gap… look, we can pretend to be this perfectly evolved species of always equitable and simple moral choices while ignoring literally the whole of human history which heavily implies an attraction in humans to young adulthood that doesn’t seem to wean with age, or we can accept reality for what it is, warts and all. Personally for me, I just don’t see how infantilizing young adults as if they are helpless children in need of constant coddling and viewing every relationship as an inherent competition of power and experience where any imbalance implies irreconcilable differences benefits us as a society.

            • Vespair@lemm.ee
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              1 month ago

              Okay, I’ll try to make it more appropriate for you. Ahem:

              Why woman sell sex on pornhub okay, but women sell sex on instagram bad?

              Also human think young adult sexy. Always, but also now.

              • Baggins [he/him]@lemmy.ca
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                1 month ago

                You assume they’re following sex workers on instagram. Nowhere in post it say that. Plenty of weird dudes out there

                • Crismus@lemmy.world
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                  1 month ago

                  Young adult women who post thirst traps are looking to be looked at. Especially if they aren’t on a private profile.

                  It’s normal for men of all ages to look at women who consent with open permissions.

                • Vespair@lemm.ee
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                  1 month ago

                  Yellz0 and Kaitlyn Krems are not “sex workers,” unless you expand the term so broadly so as to include anyone offering titillating, at which point every model and most actors would fall under it as well.

                  So no, I am specifically not assuming they follow sex workers, I am assuming they follow people who offer titillating content, as expressed.

              • zalgotext@sh.itjust.works
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                1 month ago

                Not op, but imma be honest with you, I’m currently drunk at an airport bar and I appreciate the absolute fuck out of this tldr

            • davidagain@lemmy.world
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              1 month ago

              You have a strange moral stance where looking at still pictures of boobs is terrible but watching porm is fine. Where do you stand on looking at fully clothed women?!

                • Amanduh@lemm.ee
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                  1 month ago

                  Don’t people consent to other people looking at their pictures when they post them publicly online?

                • davidagain@lemmy.world
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                  1 month ago

                  I think that your line of argument is very strange indeed and I’m not sure that porn websites are quite as full of women making choices completely free of coercion as you’re making out.

                  If you had asked me where on the Internet women have the most autonomy, have their preferences enacted most carefully and where their consent was prized, I wouldn’t have guessed in a thousand years that you expected me to answer “porn websites”.

        • Croquette@sh.itjust.works
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          1 month ago

          At one point, if you explicitly put your body on social media, multiple time, on multiple platforms, that’s kind of the expected behaviour no?

          Sometimes, i wanna watch porn and sometimes I want to look at women that I find attractive. Does that mean that I have to exclusively watch someone my age?

          I much prefer looking at women my age, but let’s be real, the older I get, the less I see them on social media.

    • lowleveldata@programming.dev
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      1 month ago

      This is what peak mansplaining looks like

      Is this just a new form of “Who asked?”? I mean, people can still speak out their opinions even if no one asked

  • spacecadet@lemm.ee
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    1 month ago

    I’m not an old dude, but I mean these women need that crowd to make money. It’s weird calling them creeps but at the same time they are posting nearly nude photos of themselves publicly on social media. Who do they think is following that content? Physicists at CERN calculating the new gravitation force off of your oversized diaper butt BBL? medical doctors determining the tolerance a 115lb woman with 1000cc of silicone can tolerate? Get real, you’re posting your tits because you know exactly those types of dudes will follow and you can either trick them into giving you money for feet pics or buying you a weekend in Dubai.

    These 22 year old “model influencers” will be begging for these old dudes to pay them attention when they hit the wall in 5 years.

        • spacecadet@lemm.ee
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          1 month ago

          Is an incel someone who doesn’t white knight for women who couldn’t care less about their own existence? It’s gotten to the point where incel just means “a guy who believes men and women should be equal”. Yeah, I was exaggerating when I was saying 27 but there are tons of women online regretting not taking relationships more seriously when they were in their 30’s.

          • Eatspancakes84@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            If men only date women below 30 (or 27 apparently??) for their youthful appearance, what incentive do those women have to take dating seriously? Those men won’t stay anyway. This is the main contradiction in incel rhetoric. If you don’t like to look at women past 30, women shouldn’t date you “seriously “ while in their 20s.

          • AbsentBird@lemm.ee
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            1 month ago

            It’s gotten to the point where incel just means “a guy who believes men and women should be equal”.

            No, that’s not even remotely true, and it’s not what your previous comment was saying either.

            Incels are essentially misogynists with a sexual fixation. Like classical misogynists tend to be more occupied with women having jobs or holding positions of power, while incels tend to be more upset about women’s sexual habits, but both are preoccupied with hating on women they deem to be misbehaving.

            I think the part of your previous comment that gave the most ‘incel vibes’ was the bit about women begging for attention after ‘hitting the wall’ in their 20s. Maybe you intended it as a comment on women who regretted not taking relationships more seriously in their 30s, but it came off as a sort of fantasy where the women who transgressed your model of how ladies should act get their just desserts.

          • Traegert@lemm.ee
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            1 month ago

            It’s become a generic insult like re*d or faot was. Or still is for some people. Probably the same crowd. Saying that creepy old dudes are generally mainly interested in younger women and would lose interest as they get older is kinda the point of why they’re creepy old dudes. Not an incel thing to say, just how creepy old dudes work.

          • roscoe@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            1 month ago

            Lingua franca dude. I’ve never heard “hit the wall” used outside the man-o-sphere. Maybe not exclusively incel, but incel adjacent at least.

        • flicker@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          That “hit the wall” stuff is always hilariously transparent. It’s a self-soothe. “She won’t be worth it in a few years anyway so you’re missing out.”

          I’m 38 and the wall where I stop getting unwanted attention sure never seems to come. Which is disappointing. I’m really looking forward to my crone era.

          • Sirence@feddit.org
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            1 month ago

            The ones using the wall thing can’t even tell how old a woman is anyways. I got told I’ll hit the wall once I reach 26 and then I will have regrets. I was already well into my 30s at that time.

          • Amanduh@lemm.ee
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            1 month ago

            So the moral of the story is that boobies are good even after they turn 27?

          • TheLowestStone@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            Your comment very much reminds me of an episode of 30 Rock in which Liz Lemon starts dressing like an old crone and acting crazy on the subway to secure a place to sit.

          • figjam@midwest.social
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            1 month ago

            Have you started collecting toadstool and eye of newt? How is your mad cackle coming along? Are you behind on setting up your 401crone?

          • RBWells@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            I have written this before, but I don’t think it actually stops. I do not think it’s even about looks really. Or at least I’m over 50 and still getting catcalled on my way to work. Fully expect to be 90 and have some kid yell “Lookin’ spry, grandma!” at me from a moving car.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        I will say that by 27 creepy old men did stop yelling their attraction at me as I walked down the street, which was nice

        • WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          Dicaprio hasn’t been a role model for me since I saw him in basketball diaries and spent the next few years trying to be just like Jim Carroll. Never again Leo. Never again.

    • Sirence@feddit.org
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      1 month ago

      I can’t find where she called them creeps but I think her issue is that they are married.

    • Katrisia@lemm.ee
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      1 month ago

      If I were to do that, I’d probably do it for the money. I would get unfaithful followers (hard to pinpoint who because open relationships and other types of relationships exist, but statistically, there would be), and that wouldn’t make it any less uncomfortable. I personally hate unfaithful/dishonest partners.

      • interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml
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        1 month ago

        I think the concept of sexual cheating is obsolete and malignant psychological evolutionary flotsam that should be stamped out. That those who wish to reinforce its social presence should be bullied and ostracized for it.

        • Katrisia@lemm.ee
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          1 month ago

          I disagree. Violence is not the answer, and especially not against people that are living in a way that doesn’t hurt others. If a couple (or polycule) wants to be sexually exclusive, they have the right to do so, and they do not hurt others because it’s not a social imposition for everyone.

          Edit: I mean, I understand questioning why we choose it, “deconstructing”, as we now call it, but after that, I think it’s an intimate matter.

          • interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml
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            1 month ago

            Yes, I only applied as much force and violence as the normative consensus. I mean… not even close since they used to stone adulterers to death so.

            I think claims in favour of sexual exclusivity enforcement need to be taken skepticism at minimum but ideally string opposition.

            Also need to avoid mote and bailey arguments about this.

        • Katrisia@lemm.ee
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          1 month ago

          It depends. Some relationships are open to pornography, others aren’t. Some are open to sexual intercourse outside their people, but others aren’t. It’s about consent and agreeing to live in a way that all needs are met.

          That’s why I said it’s hard to know who is betraying their partner and who isn’t, because maybe a man or woman or whoever following an erotic/pornographic content creator is not outside what their partner(s) expect, or maybe they are.

          Anyway, I do not like people breaking their “contracts” instead of talking them out.

    • DempstersBox@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      You may not be an old dude, but it sure seems like you already hit the wall.

      Friend of mine’s father, who was seventy at the time, got hit on by an older lady at the grocery store.

      Lamenting that he didn’t follow it up with her, “she was eighty, but a young eighty, if you know what I mean”

      Wall? Gtfo, dumbass

      • fine_sandy_bottom@lemmy.federate.cc
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        1 month ago

        I think you may have misunderstood.

        If you’re a 22yo “influencer” and your target market is people who follow 22yo influencers then it will be difficult to generate engagement when you’re 27.

        That doesn’t seem that controversial to me, and I don’t see how octogenarians getting laid at the supermarket is relevant?

  • paddirn@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    That’s literally the only reason I signed up for Instagram, but over half of my feed has become wholesome videos of people doing arts & crafts, woodworking, cooking, animals, inspiring vignettes, graphic design hacks, and bunch of other things. As cool as those other things are, I just wanted to see boobies.

    And one of the weirdest things about Instagram, is that nudity is banned UNLESS the woman is breastfeeding (and a few other scenarios). So this seems to have spawned a weird sort of genre of what appears to be breastfeeding porn, women who are posting nude videos of themselves while breastfeeding, specifically to get around the nudity ban. It’s kind of weird and exploitative, I don’t really understand why it’s allowed (except for educational purposes, but these videos don’t seem to meet that bar). It’s like, showing breasts is offensive because kids might be able to see nudity and we don’t want kids seeing nude women… unless we film the nudity with kids in it, then that magically makes it ok.

  • don@lemm.ee
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    1 month ago

    I don’t really see how wives following a bunch of young women is weird, they often socialize quite a bit with each other.