Personally I call shenanigans having had executive and standard office chairs made of leather, pleather and nylon mesh.
None of these are comfortable on the bare butt, and even will get sticky once you start sweating against them, so I’ve always had to drape towels between me and the chair.
Also do not get leather / pleather if you have cats.
Still baffles me how many people are convinced that you can ‘wipe properly/thoroughly/enough’. It’s exactly for that reason that I avoid sitting down in public transportation. Anyone who either possesses the instinct of not wanting to smell like shit and/or has had the ‘privilege’ of cleaning someone else’s butt (say, a small child or an adult in need of special care) knows that the words ‘wiping’ and ‘hygiene’ can only be used in the same phrase if there’s also the words ‘wet’ and/or ‘wash’ and/or ‘soap’ in it. Otherwise…of course your f****g chair stinks.
Guys like this get girlfriends and yet I’m still single.
I know. Straight girls cannot have standards. Or need to fetishize awful shit. Or die alone.
I…what?
A cure for hetero. Imagine if you could casually hook up with any of your similarly cute friends. And also intuitively understamd the plot of anything made by hideo kojima.
Dude, heterosexuality isn’t some kind of disease that needs to be cured. I would take intuitive understanding of Kojima’s plots, though.
It wouldn’t be some kind of disease if men didn’t generally suck so badly. Instead we need to invent the bisexuality gas.
Every time I see this pop up, I’m reminded of this chair I saw once at my old place of employment.
spoiler
Nooooooo
This is actually a sad story, where the existence of this clip almost pushed the teen to suicide due to the both online and real life bullying and death threats he received. Last time I caught up they were feeling better.
that’s sad. kid clearly is autistic. it really sucks that he didn’t have anyone to support him and teach him social and hygiene skills.
fuck the bitch screaming at him. I know she’s frustrated but his timid submissive response is telling that it’s not the first time she’s treated him this way.
Friendly reminder, wiping your arse with dry paper is not sufficient to clean it following a dump run.
A bidet (european style) is best.
no itchy/smelly bumhole ever again
I use a portable bidet. It is a rubber squeeze bottle. I use it to wash my asshole and a little toilet paper to dry.
The thing paid for itself many times over in toilet paper saved.
I like the idea of a bidet anywhere I go, as I feel like a literal disgusting caveman when I can’t use one.
But I feel like a portable one used in a public restroom would make me want to deep clean it every time I use it, and you kind of can’t in public. Also what’s it like to sneak it into a restroom discretely?
For some reason I am offended that you used a / between itchy and smelly implying that it will be both.
if there is poo left there, it will be both
A proper diet would also help. Failing that, I just take a shower right after, as you put it, a dump run.
A shower with soap is best, preferably after a different method. But whatever it’s your house, you can shit direct to shower if you like.
If you got poop on you anywhere else. Dry wiping it would not be sufficient. Rinsing it off and patting it dry would not be sufficient. You would wash with soap.
That said, I have a bidet I use some of the time and plain old TP the rest of the time.
Bidet crew checking in.
Mines got hot water. I don’t mean that it’s got a pipe for hot water, and you have to wait forever for it to warm up. I mean it’s got a water heater built in. And a heated seat. And a hot air blower… dryer? Butt hair dryer? It’s nice, especially in the winter.
Clean your butts, people
what brand? i tried a biobidet and was horribly disappointed with the water strength compared to my cold non electric
The vivohome with knob, not remote.
Pressure is great, too much actually, depending.
I got it because it was the cheapest one with all the features, and in fact is even cheaper now than when I bought it.
It’s been going strong for 3 and a half years now
A cold Bidet booty blast in the morning will wake you up better than a cup of coffee.
So you know that ice cold water sprayed into your ass can give you brain freeze, right?
😂
I’ve got a cheaper, tap-cold only version (mainly because that’s the easiest to install without running new plumbing or electrical in that particular location). Honestly the cold water isn’t so bad. It can even numb things up if you’ve been dehydrated and launched a particularly stressful cannonball.
Holy shit This thread is hilarious I was laughing non stop for 10 mins
eating shitty food and farting all the time and not wiping your ass properly are probably the culprits so yea better hygiene
But… How the fuck is it getting on the chair? Sitting there naked and grinding it in!?
The part not seen here is that the guy hadn’t showered for over a week “because CSGO2 just came out”.
Farting while sitting on it would be my guess
If it’s fabric then the smell will permeate into it and stay there. Certain things like vinegar and baking soda might get rid of or lessen smells though.
Get the cheapest vodka and a spray bottle, works great on all upholstery smells
That thread was a total mixed bag of people trying to be genuinely helpful and ripping on the guy. It was something to behold.
People should not rip on the guy unless he is one of those “it’s gay to wipe my ass” morons. I have no idea how many, but some amount of people have issues with things like this; I know I did when I was younger. Slamming people should not be the first choice.
I agree with you, especially since he did ask for help. I have a feeling he was aware of what the issue was but was in denial about it. But, if someone were to ask me if I could sum up Reddit in a thread, that would be a contender if not the top choice as an example of what to expect. That or “what is potato”
Okay semi unrelated question, but do mens gym showers usually smell like poop?
Because I recently got a fancy gym membership through my employer that allows me to go to basically any gym in the area, and so far the shower in the mixed gender sauna areas has always smelled like poop, while the showers in the woman’s sauna and changing room haven’t.
Might just be a weird coincidence, but it’s been like 5 different gyms of different chains and I’ve been really bothered by itOne possibility: Guys will keep the same crack-sweaty shorts in their locker and use them over and over without washing them. It doesn’t take too many doing that for the aura take over the locker room. Some guys really have no sense of personal hygiene.
If it’s specifically the showers, then the staff are not cleaning things up properly.
Maybe it’s just terrible plumbing, that pushes shit below where those showers are.
We had an issue at work where flushing in the men’s would cause the shit to pop up in the ladies toilet. There was a fair few arguments among the women over who was leaving floaters.
That’s horrible but kinda hilarious too. Wondering how the hell they tracked that one down.
“Well this one had bits of corn and bean in it but only Bob had that today for lunch and I’m positive I saw him bolting for the men’s room, so mayyybe…”
No they don’t. At least mine doesn’t. Probably because they clean their toilets and showers.
Find a new gym. If they’re not cleaning the shower, what else don’t they clean?
As I said, it’s been a universal experience in the 5 or so different gyms I’ve tried so far. I’m obviously not going into the bad smelling shower because the women’s showers actually are clean. So idk if that can be blamed on the gym
I’m saying this without knowing anything about your gym. But in my experience. There are often more guys than girls who work out at a gym. Guys are more likely to go to the gym more often, with a set routine and put in some work.
Where am I going with this? More guys, who sweat more, use the shower and thus it becomes dirtier, quicker. Simply due to there being more guys that use them. And then it starts to smell more. Especially, when the staff doesn’t clean the showers very often. And doesn’t do a very thoroughly job either. Dirt and bacteria accumulates as a result and stink up the place.
the fact that you’ve experienced this at multiple gyms, I don’t think is attributed as much to guys shitting in the shower, as I would say it’s the multiple gyms that are consistent in not cleaning their showers.
The gym I go to have a sheet inside the locker room where the cleaners sign off every time they clean the toilet and showers. According to the sheet, they do so regularly, and by the cleanliness of both the showers and the toilet. I believe them.
There are an awful lot of men that are so insecure and terrified that they think touching their own ass to wipe/wash it makes them gay… So they don’t wipe/wash their ass at all.
And thats why they, the things they touch, and the areas they congregate, always smell like shit.
It smells like shit, because it IS shit.
I worked at a foundry a while back and they had a locker room and showers so it was normal to have fully naked guys just walking around, this was fine, the problem was the guys that didn’t wipe their ass properly and sat down on the bench by the lockers before showering… The benches were a light pine color, you could see spots of shit where people sat, just dried on there.
I never sat on those benches, even to put my boots on, people are disgusting.
Yeeup… That kind of shit (in both the literal and figurative meaning of the word) is why I hate any public/shared/not my at home shower.
No, they don’t.
It’s either a weird coincidence or in perhaps that the fitness chains areusing the same plumber and that guy is doing a shit job.
No. If I went to the showers and they smelled like poop I would leave that gym.
yep, if showers smell like shit, its cause theres shit somewhere.
The real answer is to get a bidet, have a better diet with more fibers, be more thorough when cleaning yourself.
Just use perfume
how the fuck a chair smells like poop?! Is he siting there without pants? Did he poop his pants in thr chair?!
5 bucks says he doesnt wipe his ass after shitting, or wash his ass in the shower, so has a perpetual skidmark, possibly even full blown melted toblerone.
I hate the phrase, “full blown melted toblerone”. Thanks for sharing 🤣
I am glad to have, now, a permanant place of residence within the warehouse of your trauma. 💩
I also judge this guy.
I also judge this guy’s dead wife.
I guess he forgot to scratch his back as well
