This is some ferengi shit.
Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
Greed is eternal.
Nothing is more important than your health… except for your money.
Every man has his price.
Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever.
Treat people in your debt like family… exploit them.
And my favorite rule in this context:
A man is only worth the sum of his possessions.
That car looks like it just disintegrated.
Bro it did
The Rapture of the Rust.
It returned to nature… Some of it as micro plastics.
Some rust, cold AC
Gotta pay for that coffin somehow.
Leaves it where? The Mariana Trench?
Sounds like a fair deal? Something I’m not picking up.
The joke is that The Onion is parodying an obituary, where you remember someone’s life and the people close to them. So instead of saying “he leaves behind [family member(s)]”, they turn it into a Craigslist-style ad for his pickup truck.
Sebring is more of a sedan or cabriolet depending on exact model tbh
I saw the word “pickup” and had a brain fart. Yup, you’re right. I’m 99% sure anyway that their pickup trucks in 2006 would’ve been Dodge RAMs.
