I’ve actually skipped work just to help a homeless guy get his beard trimmed. Bought him pizza too. Kinda hard to get anywhere in life when you look like shit.
Be kind to the homeless, they just need a helping hand here and there.
What would you do?
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100% this.
I was a volunteer treasurer at a youth homeless shelter.
Sadly, it’s not possible to evaluate someone’s intentions when they knock on your door and ask for a sandwich. They might truly just want a sandwich, or they might have other intentions entirely.
Our local cities have been shutting down homeless assistance and food banks. Even the churches aren’t allowed to help anymore… ☹️😭
It’s not typically the person that knocks that you gotta worry about, it’s the person that doesn’t knock that you really gotta worry about.
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You should never assume any stranger is safe. But take each person’s situation separately, some struggling people are actually legitimately honest.
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Honestly, the fella I helped didn’t even knock on my door, I knocked on his ‘door’, while he was resting at a local bus stop.
I had already known the fella for a few months in passing on my bicycle rides. I realized he was a good decent honest person, but he needed a haircut and beard trim.
Well, I happened to have trimmers, and figured that was the least I could do to try to help him out. That, and a pizza and a beer, just because…
Edit: Yes, I went out of my way to help this particular fella, he didn’t actually knock on my door. But, what if it was 120⁰F outside, and some stranger knocked on your door asking for help?..
That’s not very true, unfortunately. Knocking allows someone to somewhat figure out if anyone is home, allows a person to gauge who is home (a man or a woman) and how easily the knocker can gauge overtaking them. Breaking in means the homeowner may have time to get a weapon and means the knocker will have to search for anyone home.
Getting them to come up to the door and see if they’re armed makes it easy if a person is looking for a victim. People just breaking in are usually hoping no one is home and just wants to rob the place.
I guess it partly depends how far out in the woods you live. The dogs will announce an intruder before they even get 100 feet close to your home, and I had my cats trained to knock on the door knocker, when they weren’t out eating rats anyways…
Homeless or rich it doesn’t matter I just don’t trust people anymore. With that said though I will happily help guide them to resources and donate to shelters fairly often. I have some bad history with strangers so even though I’ve tried working through it there doesn’t seem to be much change.
You doing what you did is awesome and I bet really helped that guy with more than just a shave.
You seem to have “but what if” responses for every answer.
My answer is no because I don’t trust them. Same reason I keep my little dog away from all pit bulls, I don’t trust them. Same reason I accept some women want to keep distance with all men, lack of trust.
There’s water in the bubbler at my local park.
Yes, of course I intended on my post to be interpreted hypothetically. Every situation is different, and every person is different.
Hell no.
Are you u all living in rosy mc Rosewood Santa’s little safe harbour everything is fine and dandy rainbow world? Or are you all lying through your teeth?
Letting someone in your home with clearly visible psychological issues, in your circle of trust, filled with those you hold most dearly and packed with your dearest memories, that place… And then letting someone in you know nothing about?
Hell fucking no.
In the real world letting some rando homeless dude in your home has a 50/50 chance of ending up in crazy town. There is a high probability that you, yours or your stuff get fucked up. I cannot and will not accept those odds. Even a 2% chance of shit happening is a risk I’m unwilling to take when it comes to my kids.
Would I help him? Maybe. It depends on some factors (like can I at that specific time, did I help him out earlier, do I have cash on hand) Would I let him in? No f-ing way.
So real answer: money: maybe, eat & drink: anytime. Clothes: I’ve got some you can have, no problem. Bath and clean: nope. Never.
This is my thought as well. Even if things go well this time, who’s to say they will not feel entitled to come back. Maybe with or without your knowledge.
I’d send them away otherwise I might start getting a regular visitor to my house asking for stuff.
In public, I’m happy to give money or food.
While I do agree with you. Your wording could be a little bit better. You seem like a glass half empty kind of person, and I can respect that. However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation. Mental health problems come in all shapes and sizes
As someone with diagnosed mental health issues, I can tell you that I mean no harm. But sadly, the pure difference in perception paired with unfamiliarity of the two parties makes the situation insanely dangerous, not the person.
You never know why the person is in this predicament and if they have a tendency towards violence, robbery or other things. I‘m not saying they are. I‘m saying you have to assume they are before making that decision. Can you defend yourself against a pulled knife or even gun, do you have enough mental capacity to observe them at all times. Those odds do not look good.
So, although I would never willingly look down on folks less fortunate than myself. I too will never ever let a stranger into my house if they raise any concerns.
Very better wording. Sorry if I was seeming like a dick. I’ve always had the view that people generally mean no harm, but might have articulated it in the wrong way. I’m definitely trying to work on that with myself as well. I also have mental health issues, and I was homeless for a good 2 years of my life, and would have been longer if a person didn’t invite a scruffy person into their home and show them goodness and ask for nothing in return.
After I typed that, I had to think about it for a bit. I was probably one of the few lucky ones. I’ve had the experience working in movie theaters, and I’ve encountered many homeless and have had good and bad experiences. The bad is more memorable (which probably says more about human nature rather than social conception at this point), but had many great experiences with homeless people. I have stories, but I’ll save them for the sake of typing a shit ton lol.
TL;DR: I like the cut of your jib, you seem very intelligent, and have good points. However, I still believe the whole argument comes down to pessimis vs optimism. I’m a very long winded person, so tldr are hard for me
“if they raise any concerns”
Yes indeed, those words sum it up pretty well. Everybody is different. Every situation is different.
Everyone deserves a chance though, with caution of course…
However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation.
He never said anything like this, and specifically called out pretty low probabilities throughout his comment.
Thank you for your opinion, every individual is different. Homeless does not inherently equate to psychological issues nor drug addiction.
Sometimes people just had their house destroyed from a hurricane or tornado or whatever, and insurance done fucked them over, if they even had proper insurance in the first place.
Sorry you’re getting downvoted, but you got my upvote. Thank you for having enough of a mind and soul to care. 🤗👍
I am skeptical on letting my friends in my house. I am not going let a random person with high odds of having some sort of physical/mental issue in my house no thank you.
Will I help? Absolutely. Just in anywhere that isn’t my house.
I’d help them then immediately go online and beg for praise.
I don’t know if this is supposed to be sarcasm or not.
Keep in mind, not everyone knows how to use the internet or even has access to it.
First I’d wonder how they got through my security gate. I would not let them in. I’m a 5’3" middle-aged woman and I know my limitations, I’m not as young and strong as I used to be. I would talk to them through the door and not open it. If they said they wanted food and water, I might give them something but I would tell them to back up far away from the door before I put anything out there for them. Once they took it, I would ask them to leave.
Security gate is basically typing in 999
The food and water part, no problem. Strangers in my apartment is a hard no! Sorry.
I would offer to buy them a meal and pay for a low-cost motel room. I’d even be willing to buy them some toiletries to get cleaned up. I would not invite them into my home under any conditions.
I wouldn’t let him in, because my partner has very strong feelings about anyone in the house, but if he doesn’t mind waiting outside he’s getting a lot more than a sandwich and water. A full meal is a very rare thing on the street and some bread and Ham isn’t a meal. I always have left overs or prepped meals ready and he’s eating until he’s full. Water is the same, as much as he can stomach.
I’m no barber, but I can trim my own beard so I’m sure I can manage his. If the stars align, I have a real stylist down the street and I’d happy to ask if she has time for a clean and cut.
Most importantly, I’ve got contact info for shelters and food banks. When if I can’t do anything else I can help find someone who can.
Honestly, I didn’t let the fella in either. But I did bring my hair clippers out on the back porch, and made a point to trim both his beard and his head down short.
I’m not a barber either, but hell, there’s a huge difference between looking scraggly versus looking somewhat tidy. I did my best with the clippers, and the fella was very happy with it.
Then I went and bought us some pizza and a couple of beers. Why beer? Because I’m generous sometimes, plus beer is cheaper than water in my area.
Honestly it’s a bad idea. Might be fine, might not be. Not worth the risk. Some unhoused folks are addicts or mentally ill. People tend to return to places that become familiar. The might come back again. Maybe to rob you.
I’m speaking from experience. I gave a guy a place to live to try to get back on his feet, in exchange for some work. Realized he’s a severe addict and couldn’t get rid of him. Then I look like the asshole for putting him back on the street.
“absolutely fucking not, and never come here again”
Sorry, but I’ll help people when I want to, on my own terms. Before you pile on, I literally just housed somebody for over a month, in the shitty one bedroom flat I rent. As in, they stayed on the sofa and only left on Tuesday. I also provided 90% of their food and gave them money to cover an outgoing debt payment.
It was a fucking huge inconvenience, actually. A helping hand is fine, but some people will happily take your whole arm.
Your last sentence strikes a hard truth, but I totally get you. Yeah, I ain’t suggesting anyone outright adopt a homeless person and wipe their ass every day and all, just saying that sometimes, depending on the circumstances and the individual, that it’s only proper to help for a day or three, within your means anyways.
I’d close the door on him then call the police. Y’all can virtue signal all you want but these homeless people can have mental illnesses and be dangerous.
The police can be mental and dangerous themselves, what’s ya point?
Yeah, this one is over the top.
My late father would employ homeless people to rebuild wrecked motor homes. And amazingly enough, this tactic tended to work fairly well.
They weren’t allowed inside our house, except certain hours of the day in the evening. They were even welcome to drink some beer with us and shoot the shit during the later evening hours, just as long as they kept up work on the wrecked motorhome, which is where they slept.
I think they lived there while repairing it for like 6 months, and they were generally honest and legit. Never once stole a thing, they were just glad to have a place to stay during that time.
I’m not in danger. And sometimes cities like mine have special homeless units that aren’t cops.
I’m trying to imagine, as someone who also lives in Seattle, how fucking terrified you must be if you feel compelled to call the cops on every homeless person you see.
They know your by name down at the station don’t they, lmao.
ACAB includes the weirdo neighborhood watch guy.
It’s one thing to ask him to leave and close the door. But call the police? You need to touch some fucking grass. If anything you’d deserve a charge of filling a false police report for calling the cops because a guy asked you for a sandwich.
At least you aren’t afraid to tell everyone what a miserable snitch you are. Anyone I knew IRL said something this deranged and they’d be on the class traitor list for life.
My experience with homeless people on my porch has usually been them stealing from it or shitting on it. So I’d be rather shocked if they just asked for something normal.
I wouldn’t oblige the bath, but I could help them with some food and water.
There is a difference between a homeless person and a thief. It’s a bad stereotype to consider all homeless people as thieves.
In my experiences in life, thieves almost always have a home. I mean, where is a homeless person gonna store your television?
They’re not the same.
It’s true that not everyone fits stereotypes, but be realistic. The vast majority of homeless people are drug addicts, alcoholics, or both. Addicts with no legal source of income are going to steal.
I don’t hate homeless people at all, and I legitimately have sympathy for someone who fell on hard times and is trying to get their life together; I do hate addicts who are willing to take advantage of hard-working people. The venn diagram between homeless and addicts is very close to being a circle.
Yeah, it bothers me when young, naive people on the internet don’t get this. Homelessness is often a lot more than just not having enough money. Often (but not always), it involves deep psychological issues. One of the reasons why the homeless issue is difficult to solve is because you can’t just throw money at them or even just give them a house and expect for everything to be fixed. They need psychological help, and often help with addiction, in addition to the money. I feel for these people, but it is absolutely not the simple issue people like to make it out to be.
Personally, I don’t even answer the door for strangers unless I’m expecting someone.
Want a little plot twist? Everyone is addicted to something or another. Why is caffeine legal, but cocaine illegal? People piss money away at Starbucks while dissing the homeless.
There’s a slight but significant difference between being addicted to Starbucks and crack.
There’s also the fact that instead of buying a $20 cup of coffee, you can get a $2 or so cup of coffee at most any old random gas station, and still have money left to buy 2 or 3 burgers to feed a couple homeless people instead.
I don’t want to buy 2 or 3 burgers to feed homeless people. I mentioned this in another comment, but the group of people who are homeless and the group of people who are addicted to meth, heroin, whatever are largely the same group, maybe with a few outliers. Why the hell would I want to buy lunch for someone who’s going to go out and rob or harass someone for $20 so they can go buy a bag of their drug of choice?
People like myself (and others in this comment section) don’t hate the homeless. We hate drug addicts who shit all over society (sometimes literally) in order to get their next fix.
Here’s an experiment you can try: The next time you see a homeless person begging for money so they can buy some food, refuse to give them money and offer to buy them food instead. They’re probably going to call you a piece of shit and if you’re lucky, they might leave you alone after that, but probably not.
People need to have sympathy for the homeless, but not for addicts. We should have social programs to house the homeless, as long as they can pass a drug test. Food banks, work-placement programs, they should all exist and be taxpayer funded, as long as those using them can pass a drug test.
They steal our patio furniture, and then I see it in the camps down the road. We’ve had to start locking it up with chains. In this case they are both homeless and thieves.
Sadly, sometimes they can be thieves, but that doesn’t seem to be the usual case when I’ve met homeless people.
Then again, maybe it’s because my instincts tell me who to avoid from a quarter mile away. You know, like that dude behind the Burger King dumpster with a face full of tattoos… Yeah, probably best to avoid…
Several years ago, my mom started making care for folks out on the street. Some water, a bag of chips, a piece of candy. Little things like that. I started doing the same thing. It’s good to help those down on their luck in small ways. Even to to look at them and say “no, I’m sorry” when they ask for money, rather than to just ignore them. You are acknowledging them as a person. If we wish to make a better society, actions speak louder than words.
I also prefer the term ‘de-housed’ to ‘homeless’. I feel the latter places blame on them rather than the former which places blame on the society which has failed them.
I remember a skit by the late George Carlin where he suggested that instead of calling them homeless, that we should call them houseless instead, so yeah I get what you mean there.
Plow the golf courses and cemeteries! Give these folks a place to live!
This is the first time I’m hearing plow cemeteries, and I’m not sure I’m on board with that. People usually spend time there to deal with grief and losing a little bit more of a dead loved one would be incredibly painful for a lot of folks
Fuck golf courses though
It’s a joke from George Carlin. I wouldn’t advocate for plowing old ones (although dead stuff makes fertile soil). Personally, I wouldn’t make new ones, but perhaps a middle ground is to make mausoleums wbere people can be burried vertically.
Ah, I see you’re a fan of the late George Carlin as well… 👍
I think homeless is more fitting. at least to me, it’s a more emotional/painful word, which is a good thing. being homeless sounds a lot shittier than being dehoused to me.
That’s an interesting point, provided it motivates people to do something about it, rather than assigning a moral failing to the individual. I.e. they deserve it for their sins. In my mind, dehoused elucidates the lack of a basic human need: shelter. There is a solution, especially in the face of the greed of rent seeking.
