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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 9th, 2023

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  • Prepared to be roasted alive for this opinion but studies (undoubtedly of white, middle class, US undergrads) seem to indicate women find clutter and messes more psychologically distressing than men do.

    I’m a man but I’ve had many deadbeat guys as roommates and I am definitely far more bothered by messes and clutter than they were so I kind of get this.

    If you are the “mind it more” person, you will find yourself rage cleaning because the other person can wait you out as long as they want if they are taking you for granted and not concerned you’ll leave over this.

    So there are two toxic traits here:

    1. A willingness to wait out chores even if you know it’s angering people you are with.

    2. A kind of willful blindness. “Honestly, I didn’t think it was that bad.”

    The second one might be worse.

    The first is excusable (plausible deniability) with the “men are oblivious” defense if the aggrieved party is not being overt in their request that a chore be done.

    The second is a person (some women obviously do this, too) refusing to learn to empathize and recognize when things are getting to the point where it’s bothering the other person. From an interpersonal perspective this is probably more infuriating over the years.








  • I was about 8. My brother and cousins in their late teens (almost certainly stoned) were hanging out with me while our parents enjoyed a few drinks. This was normal at the time. There was even indoor smoking then!

    Anyway, I’m reading the D&D Monster Manual I got for Christmas and am telling them about dragons. I explain there are dragons that can shoot out clouds of poisonous gas and accidentally let a fart go that I’d been desperately holding in for a while at that point.

    Still the biggest laugh I’ve ever got and it really was an accident.

    We were not the kind of family where anyone let on go in public so it added to the hilarity.



  • Work to live.

    Edit: we have built a world where we measure success by money. This has meant we are all in pursuit of it all the time, even if we don’t want to be. The rich get richer by driving us to do more with less, which marginalizes those who cannot be a productive part of that. We supress our compassion because it isn’t making money. People suffer. Those of us who can contribute subject ourselves to a different kind of stress so we can enjoy a few hours of leisure here and there but we never really are free of the shackles of our employer. If you advance to a management position you are forced to evaluate and possibly fire people you could be friends with. When hiring you are evaluating how well people bend the knee. It’s not a great world we’ve made for ourselves.