Glit walked slowly across the plain, eyeing the group of hunters that surrounded the creature. It was large, much too large for the tribe to eat before the meat spoiled.

As he approached he could hear the argument already.

“No, rapal, you take that part! It was your spear that slowed her enough for us to catch her!”

“But it was your arrow that finally brought her down, Jatam, you should have that part for your family! You have 5 younglings!”

They would carry on like this for hours if left to their own devices, none wanting to be seen as greedy.

Glit approached and broke into the conversation,

“Hunters, good hunting,” he said loudly, “Karana has smiled upon you today! The beast has laid down it’s life for the survival of our people!”

The hunters beamed, proud not only of their work, but now in the secure knowledge of it’s righteousness. The hunt has been approved, sanctified by the Storyteller, the one who speaks for the gods. They know they will be rewarded.

The hunters began disemboweling the enormous creature and cutting the choicest sections of meat off of her as Glit began to tell the story of Olana, the great Mother Elephant. He has told this story many times, but the hunters never tire of hearing it. When the work is done, and the story is told, Glit will reward the hunters and walk back to the tribe with them.

Well that’s going on the list

Beat me to it. Mine was “storytelling and sexually gratifying the hunters in exchange for food”

Jesus, could that actually kill someone?

There are no winners in a game of Ball Ball

My library made us take the balls out and give them to the librarian when we were done with the computer.

We used to huck em at each other’s nuts

Gonna ruin me, but seconding. Brick in the window video?

Raylin is the one that needs the reassurance, Vanessa (right) knows exactly how beautiful she is. Raylin ain’t never had a man bring her fish every day for three years. Everybody stops to take pics with Vanessa.

Dont forget that time the hurricane hit Tennessee and it fucking flooded the mountains

Everything is totally normal

You’re right. I forgot about that. It was glorious.

When was the off? Motherfucker has been daily news, even during biden’s term. Fucking news can’t stand a day with out him. He was right about at least one thing: he’s good for ratings.

I’m so fucking tired

Max from the goofy movie. Started a life long love of stoner burnouts that has continued to hurt me to this day

Just for science, if course, please provide more information about spells for men to obtain male lovers…

Holy shit! I do remember those now that I see em. Haha

I don’t know those! Link?

Reminds me of that scene from the emperor’s new groove

“Tell us where they are and I’ll burn your house down!”

“Don’t you mean or?”

Came here just to make that joke!

Yeah, it makes for a great story, but in the moment it was fucking terrifying. Especially considering that’s not the sort of environment I’ve ever been comfortable in. I don’t do drugs or party like that

Kind of. The only TV’s that had it were the living room and my parents bedroom, so we had to make sure no one was home haha

I’m actually currently writing my mom’s! My life has been positively mundane compared to hers!