the amount of bigoted dipshits confident that they’re going through the pearly gates has me half convinced they’re right and half convinced that i’m not missing out on a whole lot

1984 or something idk i dont read

this girl knows how to bedrot

well step one would be to put on an episode of bob the builder

Ms-PL 😱

• post a teehee teehee :3c on the internet

everyone needs a tool that in their arsenal

she’s even planning a future with you <3

taken from this and the point is that dennis (the guy in blue) is a terrible human being. though i will tag it as nsfw because it does touch up on very sensitive topics

well no the ventilation duct isn’t actually sucking the meat up it’s just a joke. the fly is carrying it

i have a feral housewife. it’s fucking exhausting: wake up, give her tuna, spray her with water when she starts scratching the curtains, defend myself from her claws (spray spray), change her litter (gross), tend to my wounds, spray her with more water (now she’s scratching the couch), back up slowly to the kitchen table while keeping eyes locked, and that’s just before breakfast! oh but i can’t even eat yet because there’s another one at the door. poor thing though, we gotta get her cleaned up. maybe she can stay for a day. just a day.

so do they like… play fetch?

your ketamine tranq gun vs my skin (it’s excellently lathered in extra virgin olive oil)

the blood isn’t even that dark red!