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Cake day: June 23rd, 2023

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  • A couple years ago I rage quit a gaming session (during a break) with “Whelp, I’m gonna go do something I enjoy.”

    My teammates understood. They were all very good at the game and I was not. I kept getting absolutely trounced, and was bringing them down with me.
    It’s now sort of an in-joke/phrase we use unironically when the vibe is off but we still like our friends.









  • To your point about billing -
    My insurer recently informed me that a claim submitted last September had been denied. Looking at the original explanation of benefits from September, it indicated that the insurer didn’t think the medical code was appropriate for the appointment, and wanted more information - stating they would work with the hospital to work it out.
    I haven’t heard anything from the hospital, but I’m growing concerned they may just send the bill to collections due to the time elapsed.


  • A few weeks ago, a mom was at the hardware store with her young son – he was about five years old.
    For some reason, we crossed paths a few times, And each time she was talking with her son about the things they were buying in the projects that they were buying them for. But what Caught my attention first was he asked her ‘What if we can’t do it?’ and she responded with ‘Well then we learned how because we can figure it out.’
    This woman was endlessly, encouraging towards her son, and it was clear that she was setting him up to have an attitude of feeling like he was capable of tackling things in life. Which is something that I didn’t get us a kid - I was often told that I couldn’t do things or the things were beyond my capability and that if my mom didn’t know how to do something that it was basically impossible for me to figure out how to do it as well.

    I was so impressed by their interaction, that when I saw her later while I was checking out, I actually said something to her and after she figured out I wasn’t trying to pick her up, she took a moment and like… just looked satisfied. I was happy with the interaction.

    Beyond the fact that I mostly grew up without a father and my mother was very self focused to the point that it was pretty detrimental to me, I also grew up with undiagnosed ADHD that I only learned about in my early 40s. I am constantly discovering ways that I feel broken in the world, so you are not alone.


  • You are not a machine and you have the right to happiness. I hope you find it.

    I recommend therapy, if you haven’t tried it, and if it’s not working, I suggest different therapists, or different types of therapy. It’s okay to tell a therapist you’re not getting much out of their style/your relationship with them, and ask for their assessment of what you should be looking for. Then go look at that. Keep trying until you find something that clicks.
    If it helps, in your shoes I would view it as a continuation of your parental duties. When she moves out, or maybe has kids of her own, you can continue the relationship with her and your grandchildren as your genuine, authentic, and - perhaps - happy self.


  • An ex from a meaningful, but fraught relationship tried to seduce me a few months after we had broken up. In the interim, I had started dating someone new, and I rejected the advances.

    My ex was angry and lashing out. She said a few random insults about my new partner (implying she had manipulated me with sex), before finally saying “well, I hope she enjoys your magical penis!” (It’s not magical. The tiny wizard hat is purely for decoration.)



  • Monument@lemmy.sdf.orgtoScience Memes@mander.xyzQuick Chat
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    1 month ago

    I have this notion that one day it would be nice to be neighborly enough to just put out a sign that says “fresh coffee”, “brunch”, “Beer on tap” or whatever as a signal that people should drop by for a chat.
    But I’m not really in my neighborhood’s demographic. It’s an older neighborhood, and the only folks close to my age seem like extreme introverts.