• fckreddit@lemmy.ml
    0·
    4 months ago

    I ‘attempted’ suicide last Friday. It was more a pathetic gesture than an attempt. I was hospitalized for about a day. So, the protocol was to put the patient in ICU in cases of poisoning. I cannot talk to anyone for the duration because no one was allowed to see me. So, in essence, I was left alone with my thoughts. It was the worst. I realized that people aren’t unkind, just that we are taught that, to be ‘professional’. In fact, I think nowadays, we are actively removing humanities component of every subject to ever exist, in pursuit of efficiency and also, maybe to make the subject stand on its own merits.

    Another realization is that I think the rule makers think they stand far above rule followers. They don’t care about rule followers, only make rules to reduce their problems by controlling rule followers.

    Honestly, I have been feeling like ghost for far longer than I care to admit. I cannot share my sadness with anyone because there is no one to share it with. Not because people are unkind, but they don’t have time or attention to spare on me. I am a patient to be treated for someone, an interview candidate for someone else, a contractor for someone else, a client for others and so on. But, I am not a human being for any of them. I feel dehumanized to the point of being a ghost.

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.worldOP
      0·
      4 months ago

      I…don’t really know how to respond to that, other than to honestly say that I’m sorry you’re going through such a bad time and I hope things get better for you soon!

      They may not always be good at showing it, but in ways big or small, you’re the reason why some people’s lives suck less than they otherwise would.

      • fckreddit@lemmy.ml
        0·
        4 months ago

        I wish I could believe that I made someone’s life better. Honestly, considering none of my friend contact me and I am always the one to initiate the contact tells me otherwise.

    • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
      0·
      4 months ago

      Another realization is that I think the rule makers think they stand far above rule followers. They don’t care about rule followers, only make rules to reduce their problems by controlling rule followers.

      I think that’s more about the person than the rules. There are plenty of people who follow the rules who also make the rules, it’s just that the rule makers that disobey the rules tend to be egregious and/or it affects us personally, and hypocrisy is difficult to swallow if you’re the kind of person that plays by the rules. I absolutely agree that rules are often made for the convenience of those in charge probably as often as they are made to address an actual wrong. Guess which one is most quickly enforced, though…

      Anyway, I know that wasn’t the bulk of your post, but it was the one thing I could offer any decent conversation about. Hope you get what you need and you can feel part of the world around you instead of apart.

  • OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml
    0·
    4 months ago

    First thought: cute comic

    Second thought: haha ghost smile so big

    Third though: Who on earth comes up with this